David Phears

If you read this between Dec. 25, 2011 and Jan. 1, 2012 it will be timely – if not, guess what? It will still have relevance because it’s all about New Year’s resolutions and how for many of us they are redundant, ridiculous and really tired!

I wish a had just a minimal invested interest in some of these health clubs, diet programs and running shoe companies just for the first six months of each year. People make New Year ‘in the moment’ promises [with their subconscious fingers crossed] to do all sorts of things that suggest that where they will be if they do these things will be so much better than where they are now. I’m all for self improvement and desiring better for myself but I’ve learned over the years that to make a promise to myself & others just because it’s the thing to do and that this particular day is the only right time to do it – I would be setting myself up for failure, disappointment and embarrassment – I would be just doing what the herd is doing and not standing up on my own two feet.

Man, I find that it takes all of my creative energy to just do my best to live life fully and out loud each and every day!! Why would I want to put more unnecessary pressure on myself to perform at levels and frequencies that are  beyond my willingness and determination anyway? I’ll tell you why most people fall into this self set trap – because they ‘laze down’. When you seek the easy way out, when you think that  other people, tradition and culture know what is best for you, you just might be ‘lazin down’. Lazin down is the act of choosing to be lazy when it comes to creating or discovering new ways to  express and experience your life while ‘dumbing down’ to status quo living.

You are created to be the best of who you are and to feel good about what you bring and what you offer; you are here to have fun, enjoy life and to learn about love. All the rest requires broken resolutions, disappointed dreams and shattered expectations – you are better than that!

Making unrealistic New Years resolutions can be a form of ‘lazin down’ because you know when you make one – most of the time you’re doing it emotionally and competitively to prove a point or fit in to the current conversation that you are involved with at the time.

There’s a better way for creating better, more and sweeter no matter when you start and no matter who else knows you are doing it: Here’s my choice – dump the seasonal resolutions and create an evolving mindset of practical solutions!! 

Research mental tools, create reminder statements, work with people who really support you and practice looking for solutions instead of wallowing in the condition or your current position [if it's not what you want]. Folks it’s all a matter of attention – focus on the solution and you will be able to see it clearly. Focus on the problem and the clarity fades and more problems seem to arise.

Resolutions don’t solve problems they set goals and sometimes unrealistic ones which can cause more – you guessed it – problems.

If you are reading this and it appeals to you then you have a rebellious spirit anyway – so why not put your rugged individualistic mind to work and become a master at creating solutions and let the rest wrestle with their shaky resolutions!! After all - you do deserve the best don’t you?

Hey if you get the chance – check out my archived radio broadcasts on www.blogtalkradio.com !!

And remember I am still offering my Fulfillment Coaching services for 2011/2012 (leave a message on this blogsite with your phone number if you are ready to invest in yourself for the new year) – don’t get caught in the illusion of New Year’s resolutions – partner with me as your coach – and create nothing but solutions!!

HAPPY HOLIDAYS TO YOU AND YOURS!!!

Greetings, I want to invite you to click on my new page for Videos and let me know what you think. I really do enjoy interviewing ordinary people who have done extraordinary things to help others in their lifetime. So much of the real world is not talked about, reported on or sometimes even noticed by many people. The surging tide of positive thinking and kindness on this planet is the place where I choose to focus my energy, talent and passion – to promote and publish any way one man can the good that is the lifestyle, mindset and consciousness of the majority of people on earth. The time for worshiping, idolizing and condoning meanness, violence and cruelty is over. Take a stand with me and do what you can to shift the human condition one thought, one choice and one conversation at a time.

Stay tuned for more video!!

There is indeed a history of  experimentation and, well o.k., an extended relationship with mood and mind altering chemicals in my past. Unlike most politicians, I inhaled, ingested and consumed my share of the 1960′s and 70′s! What I learned in my ‘discovery through recovery’ is that life is beautiful, I am meaningful and people can be wonderful. So for me, those experiences were painfully necessary on my path to ‘enlightenment’ and personal freedom – which is how I choose to live today.

So I am drug free physically and living the life I’ve always dreamed of: healthy body, a peaceful lifestyle, loving relationships and a joyous sense of humor. The thing that really gets me in balance every time I get knocked for a loop or surprised by others decisions is what I call D.M.P. – daily mental practice. This is a commitment to find mental tools and processes to keep my creative and thought energies in alignment with my greater good and not my would and should!

In the next few blogs, I’ll share some of them [DMPs] with you. You are always invited to purchase my book ‘A Book Of Weeks’ by responding to this post & requesting one. But meanwhile the first tool I want to share was intuitively given to me during a ‘dark night of the soul’ experience. If you don’t know what that is let me explain it this way: when your whole world seems to be pulled apart, when there are deep pains in your head & heart, when totally alone is what you feel – then the dark night has become very real!

As I did the inner mental and emotional work to move through that difficult time, I used the following tool to constantly remind me of what I wanted to be aware of in terms of my mental state by observing how I was responding, acting and showing up in each situation. With this awareness tool I could  transform my thinking which would shift my attitude and create a better experience – it WORKS WHEN YOU WORK IT!!

So what I got was the word D.O.P.E. – as in NO MORE D.O.P.E. – here is the acronym:

NO MORE…

Defending

Offending

Pretending  or

Expectations!!

I chose to no longer defend myself to other people when I realized that I thought their approval was more important than my own love for myself!

I chose to not offend anyone, push my position or beliefs on anyone nor accept anyone else’s attempt to ‘dump’ their ‘junk’ on me!!

I chose to no longer pretend or put on a fake face for the fear of upsetting anyone or not being accepted by the ‘crowd’! If I have something to express I will do it! I will also take the responsibility to make sure I simply deliver information – emotion free – with kindness and no worries about how they choose to react, respond or feel towards me – because my intent will be clear.

Finally, I chose to work on letting go of unhealthy expectations. I began to allow myself to be o.k. making mistakes, allowing other people to be just who they are, where they are in their development and call it all good!

Folks, there is unbridled freedom in living as a D.O.P.E. FREE ZONE! Your freedom and happiness will be infectious and you will begin to attract more joy. Problems, trials and tragedies will still show up – but guess what - when you are d.o.p.e. free your dark nights become ‘darkish’ and the amount of time ‘going through’ the corridor of a challenging time will be significantly diminished.

Walk In Balance – David

So when I am sitting with my canine companion, aka dog, on the rocks of a jetty next to the pacific ocean I sense a dichotomy of feelings and emotions. One the one hand, taking in all of the beauty of the warm sun, the sea spray from the waves crashing upon the jagged rocks, the surfers, paddle boarders, busy sea gulls, the graceful pelicans and the occasional dolphins – I connect to a higher stream of thinking in terms of the power and ability of the creative source and supply of all life – in pure straight up evidence right in front of me! I really do feel the presence of Infinite Life – call it what you want – but yes it’s real and I actually find myself in these situations seemingly remembering that I am always and will always be in the same presence and experience wherever I am!

On the other hand I know the scene will always change to things like work, laundry, meals, bills and the daily doings and delights of human interactions, distractions, contradictions, wins, losses and running headlong into other people’s proclivities, preferences and choices. Even though the inevitability of the changing scene in front of me is real – every day I’m working on keeping that ‘ocean mind’ with me more and more everywhere I go – it seems to make things easier, less battle, fewer battle wounds, more room for laughter, lightness and yes even more love! And for me all love experienced is success! Be it universal, agape, unconditional, puppy, lustful, luscious, giving, receiving, forgiving, joy-filled, sharing,  genuine and or appreciated.

So there is a test of my theory you see, it comes when  when I’m in the dentist chair, when someone tells me they just don’t care – or some one says that I belong ‘over there’ –  when I’m at the DMV or spilling my last cup of tea – right then it can only be an ocean mind that brings me forward to peace and sets me free!!